I remember.. still. 

Rainy season was in. Many groups already packed and started migration to the North to search for new lands and opportunities. I was feeling anxious. Females going into labor soon and I wasn’t feeling prepared. 

I took too much. We packed too much. I knew we won’t make it. 

It’s blurry and can’t recall the faces. Hundreds of thousands of years have passed. I can’t see their faces, but I remember. This flesh makes me remember, still. 

Zh’Aud and Mako left two days earlier. We needed to be certain of what’s ahead of us. Couldn’t afford confrontations with other groups, couldn’t risk delays with floods bursting instantly everywhere. 

I knew the path. 

I often wake up walking it, like a reminiscence, a trauma. “Aghh!” I don’t know the words. So many languages. I sleepwalk and take that path from time to time. It is written in my heart. 

We left. And we walked. Trough rain and wind, cold and dirt, we walked, and walked.

A full season passed. Four died. Two, I had to put down myself. Six were born and slowed us down so much. 

I found what was left of Mako and I knew they were following us. “Aghh! Enemies.“

Females were stronger in their minds and left with Zh’Aud and 4 other men. The rest of us slowed down and hid, waiting for the enemy to arrive…. and kill.

The fight was short and effortless. And then, we took. We packed so much. Even today I cry and find myself walking the path from time to time, like a drunk man wondering on alleys, not remembering the way home. 

But I remember. This.. flesh makes me remember everything. 

The fight was short. We ended them all. Then, instead of returning, I wanted more. We tracked their females and took everything. Didn’t even blink, we just took. Packs, and lives. And left.  “Aghh! We are the enemies!“

When the flood hit, we were asleep.

I could only save four, including myself.

We left to meet with the group.

The path was clear and rocky, rain stopped for a few days, which was good. We walked, and moved, and walked. 

We never met with our group. The flood took them away, because I packed too much.. stuff. They challenged me; the three I saved. They went mad for losing their children. I felt it in my hearth they were right. I killed them all. And left, alone. Walked, and moved, and walked. “I felt it was right.”

I think back to that day and I am certain it was that decision I took with my heart that weighted the most. The cursed stone only needed one thought to break the heart. And it took me. Gave me this… “gift”, and eternal life to roam the world in vane, desiring what’s not mine to desire, forcing me to take without needing. 

“So many years…”

I should have choose them, not the stuff. The useless cloth and tools we carried with us. The fear of not having when needed… broke my heart. 

I was God for so many.. I was worshiped and adored, feared and hated at the same time. Monstruous and deformed, cursed …to always remember.